Wednesday, February 1, 2012

MKM Open Thread (Feb. 1 2012)

[gestures for you to come closer]

[whispers]

I'm not going to lie, this ... this could get weird.  Also, your fly is totally open and Superman underwear is not generally considered "business casual."

(This is us.  You should consider Propecia)

Okay, welcome to our inaugural open thread.  Here's you dedicated free space to chat in real time about why [so and so] just got moved to [#hilariouslocation], or why [so and so] got a dozen +1s while your equally clever contribution was totally unappreciated, or why it would be totally hilarious to recontextualize something so that it was about Uwe's basement.

I have a delete button which I tried out last night on Phin - and it made me feel like an emperor or something - but I'll keep comment_nIMGja on the sidelines unless there's something really offensive or which is likely to cause major discord elsewhere.  Also, I probably will not actually check in on this shit during the day, so play nice, umkay?

That's it.  So, you know, have fun or whatever.   Oh, hey, here's a YouTube clip to get you started:




UPDATE: Soul Train creator Don Cornelius dead of an apparent suicide. Express your condolences and memories below.

39 comments:

  1. Really, Could Be AnyoneFebruary 1, 2012 at 9:36 AM

    Don't we all agree that it's about time StuartScottsEye changes his handle to something with a different abbreviation? It's just that when names get shortened, you can end up with some common, and confusing, similarities.

    With that in mind, some suggestions:

    Immigrant Mexican Gardener
    Simmon's terrible Farts
    Eddie Money Superhits
    The Donger Knows
    Hardy Boys' Wiccan Stripper
    Gamboa Constrictor

    ReplyDelete
  2. This could end up being a nice resource for newer guys like myself. I hope it works out.

    I've been waiting for the appropriate venue to ask this, because DUAN doesn't really feel like the right place, but I have a question pertaining to the "It's so stupid it's funny" type jokes.

    Every now and then I'll make one of those (usually toward the end of the day, when I start to lose my mind), but they never seem to go over well. There are some guys execute jokes like this very well, and they are almost always well-received when properly done. I know timing plays a large role with these jokes, and I wish I could go into my bookmarks to pull a couple of examples (I know it was a different set of circumstances because it was DUAN, but Phin's classic "meme" post immediately comes to mind), but unfortunately I am on my work computer and don't have anything bookmarked here.

    Does anyone have any particular insight into what makes a particular joke like this go over so well in some instances, while a similar joke will flop in others?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This feels inside baseball-ish. Do you have any other examples, that weren't tongue in cheek DUAN posts?

      Delete
    2. If we're supposed to avoid inside baseball stuff with this thread, my bad, because that's exactly what this is, so you can disregard the previous post.

      Off the top of my head, I don't have any other specific examples. I'm speaking more to the type of joke that will get "I don't know why I find this so funny, +1" type responses. I suppose most of the jokes I'm thinking about are tongue in cheek jokes, but I haven't been able to figure out why some work so well while others flop.

      I'm probably just over-thinking this.

      Delete
    3. No no no. My bad. Inside baseball is what we do here. I thought you meant at Spin. Fire away.

      Delete
  3. mkm open thread poll: if you had to pick one commenter to make a joke that would get at least one +1 to save your life, who would you pick. give top three answers in order.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. 3. EMS
      2. TDK
      1. MKM

      But I just picked those three because I figured they'd be easy to tap out in morse code, which seems like it could be a necessity in a situation where my life depended on a comment.

      Delete
    2. 3. BoC. Funniest commenter, hands down.
      2. Steve_U. He posts all the time so his +1 ratio isn't the top, but I get the feeling that he does that because he's bored. If you said "pick your spot and then post" he would post once per day and get 10 +1's
      1. David_Hume, Hatey, or MKM. Because regardless if the joke is funny or not, IMG will give it a +1.

      Delete
  4. Really? This qualifies someone as a top-quality veteran commenter?

    Fantastic insight - Mexican nationals occasionally get their heads cut off during drug wars. Perhaps Hatey can amuse us with an L/R Chinese joke in the next post - let's wait and see....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And we have a +1! Not surprisingly, it came from someone who is active on this blog.

      Senor Hammerclaw - did you really think that was funny, or are you influenced by the citation of Hatey as a respected veteran commenter along with Azure Texan (who is, and this is a rough approximation, infinitely more intelligent and insightful than our Ursus friend)?

      Yes, I am aware that this comment will brand me as a Gawker-style thin-skinned liberal. But, come one, a joke that has no substance other than "an attractive Mexican woman will eventually end up beheaded by a Mob boss" gets a +1? Have some taste, folks.

      Delete
    2. To be clear, my response was to Sgt. Hammerclaw's +1, not METADAYSPA's +1. Damn, this meta stuff is confusing!

      Delete
    3. I liked it. I'm somewhat of a sucker for shock-value jokes though.

      I don't think Hatey's joke falls into the same category as an L/R Chinese joke, but that's just me.

      Delete
    4. Fine, you like what you like. But, if that were a pink comment, would you have approved it? If grey, would you have you promoted it? If it came from anyone other than the handful of "established veterans," would you have given it a +1?

      My guess is "no." As a relatively newly starred commenter, my guess is that you are picking your spots for positive feedback in an attempt to establish yourself with the veterans. I've been there and I get it, but let's at least be honest and acknowledge that this phenomenon drives response rate at least as much as the ninja's vaunted "hey stranger, nice job, here is a +1" idealistic philosophy.

      Delete
    5. So, anonymous, while I'm sympathetic to your position as to the joke in question, there's probably no need to get into Hammerclaw's motive for giving it a +1. Let's stick to ripping on people who aren't here to defend themselves.

      Delete
    6. The Voice Of... Well, Non-Stupidity, AnywayFebruary 1, 2012 at 11:35 AM

      Wow, Anonymous, that's spectacularly obnoxious. Maybe he just liked the joke.

      Delete
    7. Let's stick to ripping on people who aren't here to defend themselves.

      +1, agreed.

      As for "The voice of..." I'm not sure what is obnoxious in my comment. If S.H. asserts that he simply liked the joke, then I will accept it. But, something tells me that, if he is really honest, he will agree that his reaction was biased by the fact that he was responding to a supposed Deadspin legend ("legend" being defined for these purposes as someone who was here a few years ago).

      Delete
    8. To be honest, you're probably right about the approval thing. I've only been starred for about a month, and until I get comfortable with what constitutes an appropriate approval, I'm just avoiding it all together. As for a promotion or a +1 if it were somebody else, that's hard to say. If it were the exact same joke, I'd like to think I would have, but who knows.

      I also thought his delivery worked well for this joke. If he had just come out and said, "It's such a shame she's going to get her head cut off in the drug wars when she gets home" it wouldn't have worked at all, because that's not funny. Nuance matters with shock-value material like this, and I think Hatey does a good job crafting these jokes.

      A big part of Hatey's gimmick is derived from the persona he has developed for himself. Maybe you are better at separating a joke from the joke teller than I am, but if a joke like that comes from Hatey as opposed to a pink commenter with the name "JStevenson34", it's going to play differently. I generally enjoy Hatey jokes, and this was no exception.

      -Sgt Hammerclaw (got tired of switching back and forth between Google profiles)

      Delete
  5. @Anonymous

    If you don't like the uphill climb as a newly-minted star, tough shit. It's impossible to separate your appreciation for a joke from your perception of who's doing the joke-making. Anyone who thinks that is deluded. Eventually, if you stick around long enough, you'll be appreciated. For me, the fact that I can't leave a B- comment out there and get showered with +1s is a motivating tool. A new guy has to be that much better.

    Incidentally, I thought it was funny, if a bit grim. I would have promoted it, but not de-pinked it. I don't do that because I'm not going to be the guy who fucks it up for everybody.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. "It's impossible to separate your appreciation for a joke from your perception of who's doing the joke-making"

      Why? That is patently absurd, especially in an online setting where we know each other only through avatars and screen names. Do you really expect me to believe that you don't read the thread of comments, laugh (or not) a few times, and then decide where you will give +1's based at least in part on the commenter to whom you are responding?

      More specifically to your comments - why does the new guy have to be that much better? 99% of Deadspin readers have no idea who any of us are - if they see a funny joke, they laugh. That is it. We should promote and +1 the funniest jokes so that the random readers who make up 99% of the population see our funniest material. Having them see a random Hatey or Hume pile of shit that was elevated because a few commenters are dying to ingratiate themselves with those folks is a waste of time and space for the readers who actually dictate Deadspin's success.

      Delete
  6. mkm open thread poll: top 3 most overrated commenters

    ReplyDelete
  7. It's impossible to separate your appreciation for a joke from your perception of who's doing the joke-making

    Bullshit. We, the joke makers at Deadspin, are an absurdly small minority of daily readers. Those readers, to the extend that they look at the comments (and, in general, they do not), expect funny and/or insightful commentary. They do not know, and do not care, about the ridiculous hierarchy that we set up among ourselves. So, from the Deadspin point of view, the best thing you can do is agnostically promote and +1 the best comments you can so that the random visitor says "when I stopped by I saw this one featured comment which was really funny" and they come back to look for more comments like that.

    Artificially promoting the mediocre efforts of local heroes defeats that entire objective.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I guess my initial reply got eaten by Blogspot. In a more condensed version, I agree with you that +1ing regardless of name, etc. is something we SHOULD do, but am skeptical about how easy it is to do so.

      I would suggest your scrutiny of Hammerclaw's +1 is unfairly influenced by his status as a newly starred commenter, for instance. And, on the flip side, your concern about a +1 to a Hatey comment is influenced by your perception of him as overrated or over-praised. I'm just saying, it's hard to divorce your perception of the commenter from the comment itself.

      Delete
    2. That is a very fair point - I have to admit that I am biased by my perception that Hatey is a hack who established a misanthrope personality a few years ago and has coasted along since then while receiving support from new and/or insecure commenters who view giving +1's to the local legends as a path to relevance.

      As for Hammerclaw, I think he has a lot of talent - I was not intending to single him out for his own contributions, but rather for his willingness to support a ridiculous "hierarchy." I fell into the same trap a few years ago when I got my star, so I am admittedly biased.

      I'll leave it at that. I love what we, collectively, do here. My only point was to encourage us to be a bit more objective about who we promote so that our best efforts are consistently put forward to the vast majority of readers who have no idea who won COTY last year.

      Delete
    3. The Golden State Warriors Marketing DepartmentFebruary 1, 2012 at 12:55 PM

      Artificially promoting the mediocre efforts of local heroes defeats that entire objective.

      Go fuck yourself.

      Delete
    4. Now that is the cogent analysis that we hope for. +1

      Delete
  8. This would seem to fly in the face of bothering to mandate quality comments in the first place. As I understand it, the joke-makers are additional content for readers, many of whom consume it regularly without participating. Otherwise, it's a huge circle jerk, so why bother with the starring, the ninjas, etc.?

    And also, even if an unstarred/pink commenter got, by everyone's fair-handedness, the most +1 replies on a post, would that even be the featured comment? I don't honestly know how featuring comments works, but it seems always to be a starred commenter, thereby tacitly approving some aspects of our ridiculous hierarchy.

    Anyway, I agree that the cream should rise to the top, and that everyone should be judged fairly based only on the quality of their comment. I'm just saying it's not easy to do. At the very least, other people's perception of the joke (+1s or not) will influence yours (ok, I'll say mine to be less argumentative). I don't blindly +1 "funny" guys regardless of the quality of the joke, nor do I unilaterally ignore unstarred ones, but the presence of a star, commenting history, or praise from other commenters necessarily influences the incredibly subjective measure of humor. I think that's just the way it is.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. @BronzeHammer

      My asshole comment showed up and made my better comment look worse by association.

      Everybody go back to shitting on StuartScottsEye so this just goes away.

      Delete
  9. Can't believe this guy in Blood Week did the StuartScottsEye thing and just made up a story. What a dick.

    /I'm reclaiming the phrase, so it doesn't hurt so bad when Raysism says it. It's pretty much just like the N word. Happy black history month.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I just saw the same thing. Hey, at least you have a thing now. I mean, other than stealing Same Sad Echo's acronym.

      Delete
  10. REALLY??? This qualifies somebody as a top quality veteran commenter? http://deadspin.com/5881293/victor-cruz-is-only-a-giant-because-rex-ryan-couldnt-keep-his-mouth-shut?comment=46572510#comments

    Fantastic insight - fat people are fat because they eat a lot. Did you ever think that maybe Rex Ryan has a glandular condition of some sort, or that he's just big boned, or maybe he's secretly diabetic (could explain the foot fetish) and he doesn't advertise his business to the whole world.

    You're probably a shitty doctor, Mantis Toboggan.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. To be clear, the referenced joke was very funny. The "anonymous" above who is tilting at windmills (me) is not the same one posting here.

      Delete
    2. Thanks for the clarification, Sharting.

      Delete
    3. Whoa, whoa, whoa. I have not posted a single comment on this blog before now. And I thought Mantis Toboggan's comment was goddamn brilliant. Keep my fucking name out of your fucking mouth.

      Delete
  11. This Blog Will Someday Be Exhibit "A"February 1, 2012 at 1:16 PM

    If anyone is reading this blog, you should know that every single comment here, including this one, was made by IMG. He has created a fantasy world where the made-up people that he has made-up conversations with at night come to his made-up blog and have more made-up conversations about his fantasies.

    So if you have made it this far, run.

    ReplyDelete
  12. God help me, I am on a terrible run. In the Charles Barkley post I was about to post a picture of a fish and then write out a cease and desist letter ordering Barry to stop using the word "crappy" in relation to the NBA because it was damaging to my client's reputation. That is fucking TERRIBLE, but I was laughing so hard at the idea.

    What the hell is wrong with me?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think that's hilarious, but it's probably because I pioneered the fish courtroom drama genre.

      Look for the next installment in mySal Mon series, In Cod We Trust?, in which our intrepid Jamaican-born merman questions the separation of Perch and Skate.

      Delete
  13. The Real Phin, For RealFebruary 1, 2012 at 8:02 PM

    Hi everyone! The dungeon is dark and cold, but otherwise I'm doing okay. They let me outside for 8 minutes a day. Gotta go!

    ReplyDelete
  14. I'm so confused.

    -Sgt Bronze Hammerclaw

    ReplyDelete