Thursday, March 29, 2012

MKM Open Thread (Mar 29, 2012)

Welcome to your MKM Blog open thread for March 29, the day you were forced to link the idiotic account you used to make trite cruel unfunny comments online for a tiny audience to the idiotic account you used to make trite cruel unfunny comments online for a tiny audience.

Hey everyone, good morning.  Okay, so following Deadspin's lead, we're going to add some account linking here.  We're a little less high tech, but we're standing by to help.  To comment here, all you need to do is send me your real name, address, birthday, mother's maiden name, social security number, email address, and major credit cards - and I'll take care of all the tricky stuff.

Anyway, so I'll briefly get on my tiny soap box (it's small because no one actually buys soap in boxes anymore).  I couldn't care less about my twitter account.  It's the same as my Deadspin account, @ironmikegallego, and I just created it because Uwe and a few other guys joined twitter and there was briefly a great exodus over there to make hashtags and stuff before I realized that the whole thing is just a cesspool of false death reports and Keith Law snidely talking to his detractors.  But I think it's bullshit that Deadspin makes us do this.  Part of Deadspin's appeal when I signed up was that they made a big point of saying "create a fake account, you don't need to give us any info."  I never would have gone through the trouble of creating a twitter account, something I did only reluctantly because of my uncontrollable need to stay on top of Uwe's smoking break updates, if that was required to comment.  Maybe that's what they're going for?

My commenting is way down lately, and while I expect and hope that's temporary, I do worry for others in my boat that this will be the straw that breaks the camel's back.  I guess what I'm saying is that when you see me give the sign, we all rendezvous at ProFootballTalk and forcibly take over that bitch.

Anywho, enough of that populist bullshit.  Let's have some fun.  Here's a Youtube clip (registration required) to get you started.


45 comments:

  1. Balog Turner OverdriveMarch 29, 2012 at 10:10 AM

    Fuck yes IMG! Screw DS and their commenting rules. I just want to make some hilarious comments and down some tall boys without the man getting all over my shit. LET'S DO THIS.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. From your keyboard to God's inbox.

      Delete
    2. Wow. Until 20 seconds ago, I thought Men At Work did that song. My mind: blown.

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    3. I mean this in the nicest possible way, BBAM: you disgust me.

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    4. Just because you found me in a ditch doesn't mean that doesn't hurt my feelings, mom!

      Sorry, I had a flashback for a second, there.

      Delete
  2. Nobody thinks this is funny, right? Just checking my pulse here.

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    Replies
    1. You talking about the post or the comments? Because the post is fucking stupid.

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    2. The post. It's shit.

      Delete
  3. I think the majority of us are in the same boat regarding our commenting being down lately. Someone alluded to it yesterday, but I think the nature of the posts aren't lending themselves to the jokes as much as of late. I don't know why this is, and it might just be an easy excuse for my recent mediocrity, but I've spent time staring at all four posts so far this morning trying to come up with something funny, and it's just not there.

    I miss the Wake Up Deadspin posts for that very reason. They were very brief, but offered a lot of different avenues for potential jokes and it was a good way to click my brain into joke-making mode for the day.

    If it makes you feel any better, I accidentally linked my Deadspin account to my personal Twitter instead of the one I created for Deadspin (I clicked convert, thinking it would give me the option to enter my Twitter info, instead it gave me an "account successfully converted" message). I don't think Deadspin will ever reveal your Twitter info, or visa-versa, so it really isn't an issue, but that doesn't make it any less of a clusterfuck.

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    Replies
    1. You must be joking, Sergeant. The minimalist brilliance of "HERE'S A VIDEO OF A DUNK" or "THIS ISN'T A REAL STORY BUT SEE IF YOU CAN SPOT THE THREE-WORD PHRASE OFF OF WHICH YOU CAN DEVELOP SOME RHYMING PUNS" stories surely lends itself to hundreds of eager comments.

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    2. Well if you don't like one post, don't worry! There will be another one coming along in three minutes.

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    3. Mangini In A BottleMarch 29, 2012 at 1:28 PM

      For what it's worth, I did the same thing (linked the wrong Twitter account) - Gawker's help desk, surprisingly, actually fixed it for me. Fix it here if you want:

      http://help.gawker.com/anonymous_requests/new

      Delete
    4. Bronze: It's gotten so I can actually tell when the five or six drones who are spraying the internet canvas, Pollock-style, have finished their lunch break and are punching in for the afternoon shift monitoring the Yahoo! Sports RSS feed.

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  4. My only concern is one I've had since they started forcing new users to come through Facebook/Twitter, and that's that it's unfriendly to would-be commenters. As an existing commenter whose account pre-dates the changes, it's no big deal for me to convert, and all it took was literally one extra click.

    But yeah, if I were someone who was looking to level-up from "reader" to "commenter," I'd probably be annoyed.

    And the whole new commenter thing is, I think, kind of a big deal for the site. People drift away or get stale, even the greats, and the emergence of new voices is what keeps the commentariat strong.

    Still, from what they're saying, this is just part of a larger commenting overhaul, so I'm going to reserve judgment until the change is complete. If this latest transition leads to Deadspin still having the best and funniest commenters around, then I'll be okay with it.

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  5. I don't do the Spacebook or the Tweeter. I'm a fucking dinosaur.

    But I followed the instructions to register through Google, and it seemed to work. It was just like signing in to my Gmail account, and I'm sure many of you have Gmail as well.

    I don't like having to do things like this either, but it seemed so easy that I'm almost wondering if I'm missing something.I may be, I'm a huge techtard. Maybe a complication will arise if I ever get logged out and need to log back in. But if not, going through Google was incredibly easy, which is a big relief.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Like Gamboa, I too used an existing gmail account. The one thing I would point out to everyone though is that if you use a gmail account to log into Deadspin, it will also open your Google ID, which you'll notice if you open another tab or window and visit Google or one of it's sites. I would suggest opening the aforementioned second window or tab and signing out of the Google ID, just for the purposes of security.

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  6. Pink in the Armor Nominee rundown: "I am Commenting on This Comment Made by 'I am Commenting on This'"

    Esteemed pink commenter "I am Commenting on This" thinks the NFL should "Shut [the Saints] down," adding, "[The Saints] have been dirty for well over a decade."

    First off, that handle could easily be what Lord Comment's account should be called, but it is obvious that this particular commenter has no desire to be funny. Second, the idea of shutting down a football team is hilarious. I, for one, was completely unaware of the Saints' propensity for dirty play dating all the way to 2002, but perhaps I am just not as big of a football fan as "I am Commenting on This." I'd love to hear this guy's views on more issues, like the Patriots spy scandal (Shut 'em down!), steroids (cancel the baseball season!), Little Wayne (Predictably racist rant!) and other hot topics.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's LIL Wayne, you racist sonofabitch

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    2. TaylorKennedy saw your nomination, and raised you a missed Tebow reference.

      In reply to Same Sad Echo in the Saints post:

      There is a place in between violent bounty-crazed thugs and virtuous water-walking do-gooders...and that is where most football fans expect NFL teams to spend their time.

      I don't think viewing the bounty-gate issue as a problem that needed to be stopped is the same as hand-wringing. When a team is targeting my MVP QB with hopes of knocking him out of the game--which you do by injuring him, not just hurting his feelings or sacking him--then I have a huge problem with it and would demand that the NFL make it stop.

      With the penalties imposed as a result of bounty-gate and the lying about it, I feel confident that we will not see something like this in the future. Case closed. Job well done NFL.


      I'll be honest, I laughed.

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    3. When a team is targeting my MVP QB with hopes of knocking him out of the game--which you do by injuring him, not just hurting his feelings or sacking him--then I have a huge problem with it and would demand that the NFL make it stop

      Well, THAT certainly won't happen this season.

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    4. @IMG - Well then, sorry IMG. (Or, should I say, sorry, "I am Commenting on This." Hmmmm?) I always assumed he was formally referred to as "Little," while only his close friends could call him "Lil." BUT AT LEAST I KNOW WHO WROTE TAKIN' CARE OF BUSINESS!!!!

      @SGT - Pinks hard at work today. Also looks like regular comments are picking up a bit! Nothing like a post about horrible trampoline injuries and resulting trampoline turf wars to bring back the funny!

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    5. @ Sgt H: You don't get a notification for a pink reply, so I'm just seeing this. That is frigging hilarious. Insert joke going over head jpg.

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    6. @Talib:

      I'm only 9 years old, man! Cut me some slack.

      Delete
  7. My favorite part of Gawker's justification for switching to the new login system was when they basically said, "those guys are good at security, we aren't." By not logging in via Gawker, they don't have to worry about getting hacked and losing all our login info. Which I guess is a smart move on their part.

    And, is it really more annoying to sign up for an account with the new system? Obviously, I haven't tried it, but I could see the idea of not having to log into a different site appealing (that is, if I already had an anonymous twitter account set up to link it to). Who knows.

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  8. Uh oh. Deadspinner over on Jezebel again.

    Unlike Raysism, this guy is being a total jackass just for the sake of it. This is not gong to end well.

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    Replies
    1. Don't see him being a jackass at all. Wish he wrote as well over here.

      Delete
  9. YES! This is what I've been waiting for Deadspin to become!!!

    http://deadspin.com/5897515/very-short-debate-could-the-kentucky-wildcats-beat-the-washington-wizards?comment=48401661#comments

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  10. I'm totally on board with you regarding the login. I did create a fake twitter account to keep commenting, but don't plan on using it. Still appreciate the followers. It's going to be a boring ride for them however.

    ReplyDelete
  11. OK, I'll say it (with all due respect):

    These Grierson & Leitch posts are fucking intolerable. Reviewing a 35 year old movie? People would kill Simmons for that.

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    Replies
    1. I Like Cheap BeerMarch 29, 2012 at 2:52 PM

      Amen. They're written like the movie reviews in your typical alt-weekly. The type of reviews that can't stop gushing over any dreck by John Waters or think 90 minutes of David Lynch shitting into a bucket in a forest clearing is a cinematic masterpiece.

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    2. Oh my God, the David Lynch Shitbucket film is out?

      /runs to indie theater in Park Slope

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    3. You got that right. Not only that, movie reviews are stupid to begin with. The writer just wants everyone to think he's some kind of film expert, and it's an exercise in 'look at me' that is unnecessary and outdated. There's one Leonard Maltin and Siskel and Ebert should be spinning in their graves.

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    4. The entire purpose of a movie review is for the writer to show his readers how much smarter and sophisticated he is.

      "But while parts of Slap Shot are seriously dated (particularly in matters of facial hair and costume design; someone made Paul Newman—Paul Newman!—wear a brown leather suit)"

      GASP! The horror of Paul Newman in a fucking brown leather suit. What kind of neanderthal puts Paul Newman in a brown leather suit? Jesus Christ.

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    5. I agree with you here, MiA.
      I don't see how in one line Will says he can't believe how little fanfare there was to celebrate the film's 35th anniversary, then a couple lines later says the film isn't as good as people remember.
      Honestly I've never even seen it, but I don't really know anyone that ever quoted it either.
      Good for Will to try a new avenue for his writing, but I also agree with that other guy who says reviews are outdated.

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    6. I hate to admit that IMG's blog is doing anything right, but I agree with everything said here. If I wanted this kind of shit, I'd go read The Onion's AV Club.

      Delete
  12. Is there an emergency ninja signal?

    Can there be?

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    Replies
    1. Hang on, I'll call Scocca on his cell.

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    2. I don't know if you're talking about the original comment or the reply. But, the first sentence of that story was a fucking mess before they fixed it, so the #corrections tag was legit. He accidentally wrote something like "asylum run already run," and I think there was another mistake in there somewhere too.

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    3. I was referring to the original comment. I hadn't seen it pre-edit, so I assumed the guys was just being critical of the writing.

      Either way, I was under the impression that "#corrections" comments were always frowned upon even if they are accurate. It's just as easy to email the writer if you notice something, and they usually fix it and send you a thank you reply. Is that not the case?

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    4. Yeah, It's dickish to correct them in the comments. I send an email or pm to the author, who is almost always grateful about it.

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  13. http://deadspin.com/5897490/texas-death+row-inmate-shouts-go-cowboys-during-execution

    What is with the pink echo of Clinton Portishead?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You don't always have time to do proper HTML while trying to secretly post in class. Also, I'm lazy.

      As an apology, maybe I'll ghostwrite your tutorial on how to click the proper "reply" button.

      BOOM!

      Delete