Monday, August 6, 2012

MKMOT (August 6, 2012)

Race walking? RACE WALKING??? This is the stupidest thing I've ever seen in my life. You can't just take a legitimate sport, modify it by 1%, and call it another "sport" because you're not good enough at the original one. What's next? Synchronized diving???

Oh.

There's something wrong with a sport if I were out at the bar trying to score and I'd not mention my gold medal in it. Just run already, dudes. You know you want to.

It's open.




Posted by at
Labels:

61 comments:

  1. VuvsAugust 6, 2012 at 12:01 PM

    Great stuff already in the Daily Screencap thread.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Guy who whacked a shuttlecock so hard it went around the planet and flew up his buttholeAugust 6, 2012 at 12:18 PM

    My goodness, what a shock! Did not expect that to happen!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Marv SkeevyAugust 6, 2012 at 12:23 PM

      This is why I balog.

      Delete
    2. Guy who whacked a shuttlecock so hard it went around the planet and flew up his buttholeAugust 6, 2012 at 12:37 PM

      But seriously, I gave it a mighty swat, and it disappeared over the horizon like a little missile. Little did I know that 3 seconds later it would go thwap! and introduce itself to my backside.

      Badminton is the best.

      Delete
  3. Name RaydactedAugust 6, 2012 at 1:19 PM

    You can't just take a legitimate sport, modify it by 1%, and call it another "sport" because you're not good enough at the original one.

    Sure you can. Imagine, for example, that you had a swimmer who was not a very fast swimmer, although he could be pretty competitive over longer distances. If all you did was see how fast people could swim over various distances, he could only win one medal in his entire life, and that was the 200 four years ago. Doesn't sound too impressive, does it?

    But say you started giving people medals for swimming slower than they are able, using what some would call the "racewalking strokes". And then say you have teams of swimmers do the same thing. Now he gets over twenty medals, and he's the greatest swimmer ever!

    Yea, fake sports! But not you, MMA.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Guy Who Has A Surveillance Photo Of Raysism Making This AnalogyAugust 6, 2012 at 2:08 PM

      Delete
    2. Raysim (ETH)August 6, 2012 at 2:23 PM

      Hey, I resent that -- real runners don't stretch. If you ever see a guy doing that at a 5K, he's about to finish a few minutes behind my wife.

      Delete
  4. Guy who shot his momAugust 6, 2012 at 1:33 PM

    er, shot his mom a look when she asked if he still had the runs.

    Anyways, do any of you know how to kill a person over the internet? Because that dildo behind FlapShip would be the perfect person to kill, over the internet.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Guy who says it a knick knack, Paddywhack, give the dog a loan!August 6, 2012 at 1:51 PM

    Nice work by UEA dismissing that dick with the "Meh" comment.

    Dismiss, dismiss, dismiss!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Universal Enveloping AlgebraAugust 6, 2012 at 2:15 PM

      The weird thing is that I never actually dismissed him. When I looked at my inbox, I saw replies from StF, RMJ=H and an already-dismissed burner reply. Perhaps a faerie took care of it for me?

      Delete
  6. Some GuyAugust 6, 2012 at 2:57 PM

    U.S. looking ever the part early. Alex Morgan appears dangerous. It's a bit chippy on the pitch.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Soccer McFanafanAugust 6, 2012 at 2:59 PM

    The Americans are clearly pushing the pace thus far. Must do more on the set pieces.

    ReplyDelete
  8. GamboaAugust 6, 2012 at 3:04 PM

    Hey guys. Thanks for chiming in.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Raysism Who Is A Guy That Wont Let It Go And Enjoys This FactAugust 6, 2012 at 3:07 PM

    Why is it that every member of the USWNT looks more fit than our best female swimmer?

    ReplyDelete
  10. Some GuyAugust 6, 2012 at 3:07 PM

    Dominating play without putting the ball in the net is a dangerous game. The longer the Canadians can weather the storm, the more confident they will become. And... Sinclair has scored to give Canada the lead.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Soccer McFanafanAugust 6, 2012 at 3:10 PM

    Disastrous back line failure by the Americans. Sinclair did well with the touch. Solo didn't have a chance there.

    ReplyDelete
  12. GamboaAugust 6, 2012 at 3:18 PM

    Brandi Chastain seems to be overly praising Solo for the simplest of plays. I had actually forgotten about the recent controversy until I noticed this. Awkward.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Kenny BalogginsAugust 6, 2012 at 3:20 PM

    Dreams are nothing more than wishes
    And a wish's just a dream, wish to come true

    If only I could have a puppy, I'd call myself so very lucky
    Just to have some company to share a cup of tea with me

    I'd take my puppy everywhere, la, la, la, la I wouldn't care
    Then we'll stay away from crowds with signs that say no dogs allowed
    Oh we, I know he'd never bite me, we, I know he'd never bite me

    ReplyDelete
  14. GamboaAugust 6, 2012 at 3:21 PM

    Huh???

    ReplyDelete
  15. Some GuyAugust 6, 2012 at 3:24 PM

    And Morgan puts a cross onto the head of Wambach, who can't finish. Canada will be thrilled to take it to the half at 1-nil.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Soccer McFanafanAugust 6, 2012 at 3:33 PM

    Coach Sundhage is going to have to play psychologist as we go to the half. Momentum has shifted, and frustration has to be setting in.

    ReplyDelete
  17. derpingAugust 6, 2012 at 3:42 PM

    Skiptebow: Ultimate troll or just legitimate, Grade-A moron? I'm almost inclined to create a burner account with the sole purpose of bludgeoning him with hate every time he posts.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Soccer McFanafanAugust 6, 2012 at 3:50 PM

    Another uninspired set piece from the Americans.

    ReplyDelete
  19. GamboaAugust 6, 2012 at 3:51 PM

    The ref just missed a foul and awarded the Canadians a goal kick on what should have been an American corner. Play carries on...

    ReplyDelete
  20. Deadspin Pacer of PostsAugust 6, 2012 at 3:54 PM

    This is getting frustrating. PUT ONE IN!!!

    ReplyDelete
  21. GamboaAugust 6, 2012 at 3:55 PM

    You're a soccer fan, D Pop?

    Who knew?

    ReplyDelete
  22. GamboaAugust 6, 2012 at 3:56 PM

    GOOOOOOOOALLLLLLLLLLLLL!

    A bit flukey, but we'll take it.

    ReplyDelete
  23. Some GuyAugust 6, 2012 at 4:01 PM

    And Wambach draws a yellow from a Canadian mid.

    ReplyDelete
  24. GamboaAugust 6, 2012 at 4:09 PM

    Sinclair puts in a header. This could be a killer.

    It just highlights how dominating the ball means nothing without creating legitimate scoring chances. Dammit.

    ReplyDelete
  25. GamboaAugust 6, 2012 at 4:11 PM

    WOW!

    A rocket by Rapinoe! 2-2.

    ReplyDelete
  26. Soccer McFanafanAugust 6, 2012 at 4:12 PM

    Brilliant strike off of a splendid cross.

    ReplyDelete
  27. Some GuyAugust 6, 2012 at 4:14 PM

    Sinclair heads in a corner for the hat trick. Canada answers quickly and devastatingly. Absolutely demoralizing for the Americans.

    ReplyDelete
  28. Some GuyAugust 6, 2012 at 4:19 PM

    Leroux on as the Americans go offensive in search of the equalizer.

    ReplyDelete
  29. GamboaAugust 6, 2012 at 4:20 PM

    WOW! U.S. awarded a PK on what's sure to go down as a controversial handball. Wambach to take the kick.

    ReplyDelete
  30. GamboaAugust 6, 2012 at 4:21 PM

    The goalie guessed right, but Wambach calmly places it perfectly in the low corner. 3-3.

    ReplyDelete
  31. Some GuyAugust 6, 2012 at 4:22 PM

    We are witnessing a classic.

    ReplyDelete
  32. Bellwether JohnsonAugust 6, 2012 at 4:24 PM

    I've been to SI.com and ESPN.com, and I've gotten more accurate and timely updates from you all than anywhere else. Can't wait to watch the highlights tonight.

    ReplyDelete
  33. Soccer McFanafanAugust 6, 2012 at 4:26 PM

    The tension is palpable.

    ReplyDelete
  34. Some GuyAugust 6, 2012 at 4:28 PM

    Morgan with a brilliant run and cross to Wambach, who misses. A tough finish, but one that she knows she should convert. Entering 88th minute.

    ReplyDelete
  35. Rec SpecsAugust 6, 2012 at 4:30 PM

    Cool! This is like a really slow, and hard to update Twitter feed!

    ReplyDelete
  36. GamboaAugust 6, 2012 at 4:30 PM

    Huge mistake on the back line puts a Canadian attacker one-on-one with Solo, who was fortunately well-positioned. Epic disaster averted.

    ReplyDelete
  37. Soccer McFanafanAugust 6, 2012 at 4:32 PM

    3 minutes of stoppage time added. U.S. stays in the 3-4-3. Playing to win.

    ReplyDelete
  38. Some GuyAugust 6, 2012 at 4:35 PM

    And a harmless U.S. corner ends regulation. Headed for extra time, to the delight of viewers everywhere.

    ReplyDelete
  39. GamboaAugust 6, 2012 at 4:40 PM

    I'm a vocal fan of the "Golden Goal" system, but anyone rooting for the U.S. right now has to feel more comfortable with the two period format being used here, the way this game has been going. The field's been tilted downhill for the Americans all night, but Canada (Sinclair) has managed to squeeze in 3 quick strikes anyway.

    ReplyDelete
  40. Some GuyAugust 6, 2012 at 4:48 PM

    Uneventful start to the first extra period. O'Hara with a nice run, centers to Leroux whose sliding kick is deflected over the goal by a Canadian defender. Approaching the 100th minute.

    ReplyDelete
  41. Soccer McFanafanAugust 6, 2012 at 4:51 PM

    Heather O'Reilly subs in for Cheney, Canada answers with a sub of its own. Canadian attacker is taken down by O'Hara just outside of the box. Free kick awarded.

    ReplyDelete
  42. Some GuyAugust 6, 2012 at 4:57 PM

    Scoreless first extra period. 15 more minutes, then PKs if needed.

    ReplyDelete
  43. GamboaAugust 6, 2012 at 5:02 PM

    U.S. hasn't been able to mount any kind of attack in the extra periods. Fatigue is obviously setting in, for both sides. Sauerbrunn comes in for Buelher on the back line as the U.S. uses its final sub.

    ReplyDelete
  44. Soccer McFanafanAugust 6, 2012 at 5:05 PM

    First goal aside, the Americans continue to do very little with their corners. Their 12th of the match sails out high without a meaningful touch.

    ReplyDelete
  45. GamboaAugust 6, 2012 at 5:10 PM

    Solo starts a counter attack that leads to two dangerous passes across the box by Morgan in less than a minute. Canada dodges a bullet.

    ReplyDelete
  46. Some GuyAugust 6, 2012 at 5:11 PM

    Wambach with a looping header off the crossbar. May have been saved otherwise, but close.

    ReplyDelete
  47. Soccer McFanafanAugust 6, 2012 at 5:13 PM

    We enter extra time with Canada on the attack.

    ReplyDelete
  48. GamboaAugust 6, 2012 at 5:15 PM

    I LOVE YOU ALEX MORGAN! I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  49. I Like Cheap BeerAugust 6, 2012 at 7:11 PM

    It's official. Kinja has reduced the Deadspin commenting section to that of YouTube's.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Freeman McNeilAugust 6, 2012 at 7:29 PM

      Yep. I've said it before, and I'll say it again. It's amazing how truly ignorant some people are. I mean it really is amazing.

      Delete
    2. ErgAugust 6, 2012 at 7:37 PM

      It really isn't that difficult to put in a filter for certain words. When detected, the comment could either be dismissed or placed in quarantine until someone approves it. At the very least someone with the ability to dismiss the comment should be immediately notified that it's there.

      Delete
    3. The Miserable ShitehawkAugust 6, 2012 at 8:14 PM

      For what it's worth, I've had some success emailing the writers and faeries when I spot the bullshit. Once they're alerted to something way out of line, they'll usually get rid of it.

      Still, at least once a day a whole post will go in a direction that would have been virtually impossible before Kinja, and that's not a good thing.

      Delete
  50. Not A Guy Who, Just A Sad GuyAugust 6, 2012 at 7:32 PM

    My optimism is gone. Kinja has taken the fun out of Deadspin.

    ReplyDelete

Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)