Monday, September 10, 2012

MKMOT/50 Days of HATE- Day 1 (September 10, 2012)

Some of you may remember this. Seems like a logical place to begin.

I can't say much more about these guys than I already said that day, but this was an even earlier indicator of the disappointment to come. This monstrosity of a "power ballad", sans power, is responsible for more illegitimate royalties than Prince Harry's trip to Carnival. Yes, high schoolers need horrible music for sappy graduation videos. But did you "punk rockers" have to be the ones to provide it? LET HOT CHELLE RAE HAVE THEIR NICHE!!! And I'll be damned if I'll sit idly by while you add musical methane to the burning fire in my soul that was lit when Seinfeld ended. The way you further tarnished this already traumatic moment was egregious, outrageous, and preposterous.

I know this one has legions of fans. Please, do speak up. I'm genuinely interested in whatever shameful and misguided appeal this turd of a tune holds for you. Please note that the title of this song was not my doing.  But it could have been, for it fits perfectly, like the earplugs I will now insert. I suggest you all do the same. You've been warned.

Oh, it's open.




31 comments:

  1. I'll bite. I don't love this song my any means, but if it comes on, I probably won't change the station either.

    My thought process is this. For a Green Day song, yes, it's completely out of place and doesn't fit in at all with their catalog of music. However, if you set aside the fact that it's Green Day, as well as the shitty lyrics, I think that musically it holds up. Sure, it's no Stairway to Heaven, but it's a catchy riff that is no different than many other popular songs of the mid-90's. Also, if any of you play the guitar, it's a simple, yet embarrassingly fun song to play from time to time as well.

    I'm not in love with this song by any means, but if it was a one-hit wonder from an obscure band instead of a blowhardy shot at critics from Green Day, I don't think it would receive nearly as much criticism as it does.

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    Replies
    1. I appreciate someone chiming in with the counterpoint. You're a bold man, Sarge.

      A bold man with horrible taste in music, but a bold man nonetheless.

      Delete
    2. Mantis Toboggan, M.D.September 10, 2012 at 11:25 AM

      Here's the thing about this song. It is most definitely bad, BUT it is also indelibly associated with the clip show that aired before the Seinfeld finale. So when I hear it, part of me is all "man this chugs," while another part is like "aw, Seinfeld." Not unlike that "Butterfly" song that I played before porking Sally Perkins for the first time. COME MY LADY, COME COME MY LADY (she, of course, did not).

      Delete
    3. /adds Mantis Toboggan to "kill list" for getting that goddamn song stuck in my goddamn head

      Delete
  2. Take away the shitty lyrics, and the fact that it's Green Day, and you've got a crappy ballad with little-to-no dynamism or sense of progress in the melody. It would likely be a one-hit wonder... a terrible, forgettable one. "Hey Delilah" has more musical nutrition to it.

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    Replies
    1. I hate you for reminding me "Hey Delilah" exists.

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    2. @Uwe

      /points to passage about how the list is already made
      //whistles awkwardly

      Delete
    3. This and Deliliah are in a very special group of of awful songs. When you hear them the first time you know they are terrible, yet they're "good" enough to be so popular as to be inescapable. Their worst offense, though, is having so much "meaning" that they are the inspiration for endless yearbook quotes and prom themes and song mixes.

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    4. Marv, you are filled with rage and hate, I love it. Using this site that's supposed to be about bitching and complaining and praise about another site is, in my honest opinion, none of my business. I will continue to patronize this free service, but I'm not sure I can keep being your hype man.

      Delete
  3. Replies
    1. WHEEEEE! HEY MOM, IM ON THE KINJA SPEAKIN MY MIND.

      Delete
  4. Nice show of support by Burke to use the U.S. Open post to plug this feature.

    It's subtle, but it's there.

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  5. Lists like this are why I enjoy my musical ignorance. I am familiar with this Green Day song, but I'm betting a lot of the songs on the list are unknown to me.
    Fact: I've never heard the song Call Me Maybe, EVER! Not sure how I pulled that off, but I'm not complaining.
    Fact: I had to google "Hot Chelle Rae" just now.
    Fact: I know nothing by Nikki Minaj. I may have heard a song or two in public, but I wouldn't know.

    I'm looking forward to ridiculing my kids' taste in music in a about a dozen years.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. See, man, I don't know how you pull that off.

      In a world that is currently experiencing the perfect shitstorm of endless forums for the everyman, ever-present media, and a low bar for "celebrity" that is only exceeded in shamefulness by the public's obsession with it, I find it impossible to remain totally ignorant to even those elements of pop culture that I consider the most vapid if not all out offensive.

      Like Octomom, "Duh...Winning!", or Raysism.

      Delete
    2. Remember when Deadspin was about Sports and jokes? Now there's food articles, parenting articles, and who knows what else is heading down the pike. Gardening? Politics?

      Delete
    3. Hey Gamboa, if I'm so offensive, then why is it that some people take a picture of my comments and frame them.

      Delete
    4. The best part is that my musical ignorance is not something new that has developed with age. I've always been ignorant of certain artists and genres of popular music. The "Ignorant List" has simply grown larger over the years.
      Fact: I still know nothing by Black Sheep.
      Fact: Only recently have I begun listening to Tribe Called Quest.
      Fact: I'm always the last guy at the bar to recognize "Barbie Girl" is playing.

      Oddly enough, I'm not as cantankerous in person as you might think.

      Delete
  6. Question: should I go after a burner account or two? It's most assuredly counter-productive, but it'd be nice to break out some rage on a few just terrible comments.

    I probably won't do it because I'm an incredible pussy. But angst is very, very real.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Just type out your response, but don't click "submit." It's how I handle the rage. I've used the same method to deal with asshole "friends" on Facebook and emails from ex-girlfriends.

      Delete
    2. Start with the dipshit talking about "clit-chewing" in that Steelers-girl post. What a fucking cesspool.

      Delete
    3. Universal Enveloping AlgebraSeptember 10, 2012 at 5:15 PM

      Go for it. What's the fucking difference? No sense in not feeding the trolls when they can feed themselves.

      Delete
    4. Speaking of burners, this is how you burst onto the scene and make a name for yourself, fellas.

      I'll be honest though, I did find a certain charm to his complete and utter obliviousness to how Deadspin commenting works. His passion for the Olerud post is outstanding.

      Delete
    5. Fellas, fellas, I hear you about the fucking horrible comments and shitty burners, and we'll get to that. But lemme ask you this:

      Do you even LIKE "Semi-Charmed Life"?

      Delete
    6. Guy Who thinks there is only one way left to have fun at DeadspinSeptember 10, 2012 at 9:56 PM

      Why not? From what I can tell this latest redesign does very little to shuffle comment order based on "discussion quality," so the previous argument of not engaging the idiots because you don't want to lend the halo of your reputation to them seems to no longer hold. With that disincentive gone, why not just have at it?

      Delete
  7. Screw it. The blueTunic fix has an option to set it to be the default view on Gawker sights. Going with that even though it occasionally drops some comments. Just tired of needing to click on each reply to slowly navigate down through a comment thread. The view also makes it easier to skip over burner comments. Next step will be to only check on Deadspin when something pops up here or on Twitter, outside of DUAN. Thanks, Nickie. Good job, good effort.

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  8. Oh, thank God. I scrolled to the end of this post without reading the text and I thought the balog was breaking up with me!

    (Song sucks, but has nostalgic value for us late-90's HS graduates.)

    ReplyDelete