Also, it's not like a Guy Who Newly Defines Psychopath jumped from SPACE or anything, like it was the platform at the local Y. And if he would have, it's not like it would have been the most batshit thing to occur on live TV since Artie Lange christened Joe Buck. Meh, it's just JUMPING FROM FUCKING SPACE! No biggie. Science nerds assured his safety. Kind of an over-hyped guinea pig, if you ask me. Try blowing a line off of one of Saturn's rings on the way down next time, Super Dave Osbroune!!!
The total jump was allegedly 24 miles. To put that into perspective, that's 476 MILES LESS THAN THIS SONG I FUCKING HATE SO MUCH THAT I CAN'T PUT INTO WORDS AND IT MIGHT BE THE WORST ON MY ENTIRE LIST BECAUSE I LOATHE IT BEYOND DESCRIPTION AND NO MATTER WHERE AND WHEN IT MAKES AN APPEARANCE EVERYONE WILL CHEER AND SING ALONG WHILE I SEETHE LIKE SOME TWILIGHT ZONE PROTAGONIST!!!
I can't take it anymore. This has been in my back pocket for so long that it's time to pull the rip cord and see what happens. Entering the atmosphere... Here comes the chute... IT'S OPEN!!!