Friday, October 26, 2012

MKMOT/50 Days of HATE- Day 40 (October 26, 2012)

Remember when the sexiness in R&B was just there, without having to be forced into it by embarrassingly literal lyrics?

It's open.


17 comments:

  1. Marv! Your write-ups were absolutely my favorite part of this whole HATE series. What gives?

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    Replies
    1. My inspiration comes from the comments, so I suppose it reflects their inconsistency. Ring a bell at all???

      Also, time.

      Oh, and thanks.

      Delete
    2. Well, if it provides you with any juice, may I just say that you have lousy taste in music, and nobody likes people whose names rhyme with Favre's TV.

      GET MAD!

      Delete
    3. Creating artificial hate for songs that deep down inside you actually love, when all that you are really looking for people to do is to rush to the song’s defense so that you can feel better about your music collection, can be quite draining. Plus the more concise his critique is the less there is to pick apart and dismiss as being completely inaccurate.

      It comes as no surprise that someone who hasn’t had the pleasure of participating in consensual intercourse during any of the 365 days of the calendar year would not appreciate the unique thrill of birthday sex. Well let me tell you, it is one of the most amazing experiences you can have with you partner. I am actually surprised that this is one of the few songs that covers the subject. Just last month my wife wakes up and asks me – “do you know what today is?”. I said “of course, it’s my birthday!” She assured me that she did not check Facebook that morning so she had no idea that today was the day of my conception. She was referring to the fact that it was our 17 month anniversary. Needless to say I felt very foolish for forgetting. That being said, we memorialized our 17 month anniversary with over 3 minutes of sex that morning. Some Pajama-tops-on-bad-breath-no-kissing-have-to-finish-fast-because-I-have-to-really-pee type sex. It may have been 17 month anniversary sex for her, but for me it was intense and passionate birthday sex. So next time you think about trashing a song that is the soundtrack for my favorite 3 minutes of my favorite day of the year, you better reconsider and focus your efforts on persuading your hand into some birthday sex for your special day.

      Delete
  2. R&B Sexiness Follow Up:

    Ciara > Beyonce, and it's not even close. Fight me???

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    Replies
    1. PB&J Sexiness Follow Up:

      Skippy & Smucker’s > Jif & Welch’s, and it’s not even that big of a difference, I’ll gladly eat either one. Have lunch with me???

      Delete
    2. Crunchy, with cherry jam, and I'll let you buy me lunch.

      Simply provide your credit card number below.

      Delete
    3. This balog is secure right? I bet it’s secure – AMEX # 5555…. hold on let me google this site to see if people have gotten burned before. Didn’t come up with much, feels pretty secure – 4444, still feeling pretty nervous here, this reminds me of that time I bought Yankee tickets off Craigs list (not the website, it’s a list from this guy Craig who emails me via my spam folder, he’s actually a prince in Nigeria, super rich and very generous) and ended up with $25,000 in credit card charges, nevermind you seem like a pretty good guy… 3333…hold on, how is this going to show up on my statement, it will be discreet right? I don’t want my wife knowing that I have a fetish where I buy people lunches on balogs.. 222-..wait do you take PayPal?

      Delete
  3. Stev D showed up and made a highly generic comment. Of course, I literally started counting how many minutes it would take before a certain someone gave him a +1. It took less than 5.

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    Replies
    1. I didn't see the comment and would really like to stay entirely out of this. But I will say that the brilliance of Stev D is in the entire body of work and never encapsulated in an individual comment.

      He's at his absolute best when he doesn't appear to be making a joke at all.

      Delete
    2. Sort of what SbV8 said, StevD is really, really good. His style is different from most in that he doesn't make "jokes" the way someone like Raysism, or Steve U or Hume does, he just says funny things. Certainly they are jokes, in that they are coming from an adopted comedic persona, but not obviously mechanical setup-knockdown or wordplay like some others. There's no formula or template for his approach, and it is more worthy of respect, in many ways.

      I doubt the point you're making has to do with StevD, so I won't angrily torch this straw man, but I'll offer this all the same - if you thought of the 15 guys who you thought were the best of the best from 2006 through last week, I would wager that they would, to a person, put StevD in their personal top-5 list.

      You can argue that all 4 of the dudes listed above get some unearned +1s, but that is a reflection of them being unusually good for an unusually long time. If there are pointed looks to be shot, it's at the act of giving a +1 to someone out of excitement at seeing their name.

      Delete
  4. GET OUT OF MY HEAD, BRO-HOLE!

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  5. The critical and difficult Week 4 poll seems to be not working.

    Kinja!

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